Friday, February 17, 2012
To Be A Trophy "Wife"...or to just be a "Trophy"
Being a trophy wife is something I will never do and though I'm attracted to guys who are 2-3 years older than me, being 22 and dating or (gag) being married to someone in their 40's would go against so many things I believe in. I'm aware that people say that "age is just a number" it's happened to me before, but do they know that a jail is just a cell? This is what bugs me about Dorothea and Mr. Casaubon. He's a lot older than she is, and they both are at different places in thier life. It seems that Mr. Casaubon wants nothing to do with her nor would give her the time of day and of course Dorothea takes it because it's the "womenly thing to do" I wouldn't be with a man because he wanted me as his trophy, rather than his wife, and if I would meet someone like that he would get a straight big kickin' somewhere, where he wouldn't want it. The importance of self-worth and womenhood back then wasn't supported nor brought to the attention of the people. It was expected of the women to do and say what the man wanted. When I think of trophy, I think of something you win---in a sporting event...not in marriage. A wife shouldn't be placed on this damn pedestal for men to drool at or a form of property. Marriage should be something totally different--it's when you feel passion, protection, honesty, loyalty, to find someone who can be your best friend and who can make you be yourself when around them...not in the situation like Dorothea and Mr. Casaubon. If you google "trophy wife" the definition explains that it's someone "young and attractive" THAT'S IT!! It doesn't describe the qualities, the talents, or anything...oh and don't even bring up the images of a trophy wife!!!!! It makes me sick!
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"straight big kickin' somewhere, where he wouldn't wait it." HAHA! Betsy, I love you :)
ReplyDeleteI googled "trophy wife." The pictures are ridiculous. I feel like women should have more self-respect.
Anywho... While I do believe that age is just a number, maturity level is not. It is definitely possible for people of different generations to have a successful relationship, but the successful people are usually on the same level of maturity. Like you said, when people are at different places in their lives, it makes relationships difficult, and that is exactly what I see with Dorothea and Casaubon.
These are all good points. In the nineteenth-century, though, such age differences in couples would have been very common.
ReplyDeleteFrom what I understand of the period the commonality of age gaps is common and sometimes neccessary. Now in the case with Dorothea and Casaubon money and "martying up" was not the motive driving this coupling. But just like Dr. H pointed out it was very common for may reason. Throughtout the course I find our personal views to be driving post which is good, however; I feel that we pass judgement on character when "we" and I do include myself in this forget the time period and culture of the day. I agree with Betsy marriage can be many thing but Agreeing with Ann marriage has to do with maturity and my own opinion compromise. Which takes alot of maturity to accomplish in a marriage. I also dislike the term "trophy wife" however in some circles a "trophy wife" is not only beautiful but intelligent. The connotation is gut wrenching but I believe intelligent, beautiful woman can bring something to the term.
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